Fighting on your knees

Ladies, today I want to share something amazing.  I have been married before, once and really struggled with the whole submission thing. You tend to get this picture of domination and control over you, if you submit, do you not? The longer I am a Christian the more I learn about this interesting phenomenon. There are so many articles written about submission so many opinions and advice but what does God say really when he says submit to your husbands.

A few Sundays ago we learned that submission is not becoming a door mat saying yes and amen and being a slave but purely that both mom and dad have different roles to play. The woman’s roles are to nurture, care for and take care of our families. Dad provides and protects the family. So when a decision needs to be made within the family mom will come out of a perception of nurture and dad from a place of protection and provision because that is how we are made. Mom and dad discuss the matter with the whole family and then a final decision is made by dad. 

At this point some woman might say: ‘‘no’ I have just as much say!! Why does he have the last say” We woman do have the tendency to go into a role of control, control over the kids over dad because we feel that we know better and dad knows nothing. My problem in my first marriage was just that I did not want to give up my control because what if I get hurt again, what if I have to live under someone else’s terrible decision which is not the best thing for me or the family? It is a matter of not losing control over what is about to happen to us, it is absolutely normal behaviour. We try and hold onto things in the world to determine the outcome but do we really have control in the bigger scheme of things?  I am so sorry to be the bearer of bad news but we do not. So what can we do to help the outcome without dishonouring our husbands or insisting to get our own way?

PRAY, I had my first experience with my unsaved, x-husband that did not want to change my son’s school, trying to convince him was a task all most impossible. So the Lord said to me I do not want you to discuss it with him at all or nag him, I want you to pray. So I PRAYED. It was a matter of days before he came to me and in an absolute outrage exclaimed that he wants to change our son’s school. A miracle and a valuable lesson that I needed to learn before I got into a new marriage. My role is not to make the final decision but to pray for my husband to make the right decision. If God could change an unsaved man’s heart he can change a donkey’s heart. If things do not go your way after praying then it was not Gods way and be assured that God only wants the best for you and your family and that He does know better than you and your husband put together.

God wants to teach you to pray, fight on your knees the battle that seems so impossible. It is possible in prayer. Let go and let God take control in your family. Step into your role and pray for your family and if you are still single practice to pray instead of making things happen yourself. Let God teach you to become a praying wife and not a nagging wife. If you want a husband, do not stop praying. If you want to learn to be a good wife and have a successful marriage, pray and God will prepare you before you receive your husband.  If you want a husband that spoils you, pray and ask the Lord. If you want your kids to get along, pray and ask the Lord. If you want your husband to grow, pray. Fight on your knees. What a privileged honour for a woman to be able to pray and receive, to make a difference and be absolutely at peace at decisions made just by praying.